


In Death, Sacrifice

by owlmoose



Category: Critical Role (Web Series), Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening
Genre: Crossover, Gen, WIP Big Bang 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-25 01:38:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20368510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/owlmoose/pseuds/owlmoose
Summary: When his sister is overtaken by Blight poisoning, Vax'ildan bargains with the Raven Queen for her life. But is he ready to accept the terms of the deal?





	In Death, Sacrifice

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 2019 WIP Big Bang. Inspired by fanart I saw of Vax in Grey Warden armor, which unfortunately I didn't save so I can't credit the artist -- it might have been in the gallery that aired with "The Search for Grog". 
> 
> Ragna made some lovely art! A banner and three wallpapers, which can be found in Related Works at the end of the story.
> 
> This story jumps off from the events of Critical Role, Campaign One, Episode 44 ("The Sunken Tomb"), tweaked to be set in Thedas. Loral Mahariel is one of my Wardens; the other Dragon Age characters are from Awakening. Set sometime after Awakening but before Inquisition.

Once the battle was over, the adventuring party Vox Machina gathered themselves together to take stock of the aftermath, six darkspawn and the hurlock emissary that had been leading them lying in a heap at their feet.

"So that's done." Percy stuck his pistol back in its holster. "Everyone all right?" He caught Vex's eye. "That Cone of Cold hit you rather hard."

"I'm all right, darling, but thank you." Vex knocked the frost off her hands and looked around the thaig, ignoring the wobble in her knees as she counted noses. She found Scanlan in the corner, helping up Kash; Keyleth, still in earth elemental form, phasing out of the wall; Zahra and Grog checking bodies for loot. "Where is Vax?"

Zahra set down a piece of stone that had been shaken loose from the wall. "Still with Kima in the bottom of the pit, I'm afraid, off that way." She raised her voice. "Vax? Kima?"

"We're all right." Vax's voice echoed up from beneath, and Vex let out a breath of relief. "Could we get a rope, please?"

"On it.” Grog opened up the Bag of Holding, tossing some coin inside before pulling out the Endless Rope as he headed for the edge of the pit. 

Content that her brother would be taken care of, Vex turned around and set her sights on the prize: the dusty sarcophagus sitting on a dais in the middle of the thaig. This was why they had come, in desperate hope of finding the relics that would help them fight the unimaginable. Four dragons, with a darkspawn horde behind them, and though no one spoke of archdemons -- not yet, at any rate -- somehow they were all working together, coming into a rising tide that threatened to swamp everyone and everything in its path.

The Grey Wardens would fight the darkspawn, other adventures might tackle the dragons, but Thedas would need all the help it could get. Help from the Vestiges of the Divergence. What better than relics created by gods to fight the gods? And so Vox Machina had followed the rumors to this tomb, known only from legends of the First Blight. The vestments of the Raven Queen's champion had to be here, somewhere.

Besides, Vex thought, this place had been undisturbed for a long time. Who knew what other riches might await them here?

She climbed the steps of the dais, Trinket by her side, and perched on the edge of the sarcophagus next to Percy, who was already eagerly looking over the lid. "So," he said, shooting her a quick smile, "shall we see what's inside? I think I found the opening mechanism."

"Shouldn't we check for--" But Vex's words were stopped by a click, then a loud scraping of stone against stone, as Percy touched something under the edge of the stone lid, and it slid open. 

Vex glimpsed a desiccated corpse, dressed in feather-trimmed black leathers with the silver sigil of the Grey Wardens stamped on the breast, its hands wrapped around a dagger. And then a puff of red powder caught her in the face, and her vision faded as the vitality drained from her; vaguely she registered falling backwards, and then she knew nothing at all.

-x-

Percy jumped back from the edge of the sarcophagus, waved the red cloud away from his face, and coughed, more out of reflex than any discomfort. "Well, that was unpleasant, but now let's see what we've found. Vex, do you..." He turned, and turned again, and felt all the blood drain from his face at the sight of her body on the ground, eyes open, unseeing, chest not rising, black lines creeping up the sides of her neck. Trinket padded over to her and nudged her cheek with his nose; when she showed no reaction, he sat down beside her and let out a soft howl.

"Oh, Maker," Percy breathed, and he rushed to her other side, then shook her by the shoulder. But it was no use; she was gone, her flesh rapidly cooling beneath his hands. "Kash?" He tore his gaze away from her empty face to search out the cleric, who was tending other wounds in the corner of the thaig. "Kash, I need you. Now!"

Kash closed the gap between them in just a few steps. Percy stood up and stepped back to give him room to work, his own breaths coming in shallow gasps. If Vex was beyond saving, if his own rashness and stupidity had cost her life.... "What is it?"

"Acute Blight poisoning," Kash said, running a fingertip along the black veins in Vex's neck. "But I've never seen it work so fast. Usually the Blight is a slow death."

The rest of the group gathered around in stunned silence; only Vax was missing, and Percy turned just in time to see him crawling out of the pit.

-x-

Down in the bottom of the pit, Vax gave Kima boost up to the rope, then waited, allowing her a little time to start the climb. He pulled out a health potion and downed it, the strength returning to his limbs. Then he grasped the rope and began to climb. A minute or so later, he hoisted himself over the edge, stood, and brushed the dust off his arms. "Thanks for the help, guys, I'm sure you were very... busy...." His words trailed off at the sight of most of the party gathered in a circle-- most of the party, except for Vex. "What's going on?"

Percy looked at him, face pale, eyes wide with horror. His mouth opened and closed; then he closed his eyes and turned away. 

Later, Vax had no memory of crossing the room; it was as if he appeared at her sister's side, first kneeling next to her, then sitting on the floor, gathering her face in his hands, pulling her head into his lap, stroking her hair, too shocked for tears. "What happened? What _the fuck_ happened?!"

All eyes turned to Percy, who shook his head. "The sarcophagus-- we were checking it, and when I opened it..."

"You just... opened it? Without checking to see if it was trapped?" Vax narrowed his eyes. "Without letting _me_ check it?"

"I know." Percy gripped the bridge of his nose. "Believe me. I know."

"Bit late for that, isn't it." It took all of Vax's willpower not to jump up and wring Percival's scrawny little neck.

"Not too late," Kash said. "I don't think. I have a workable spell prepared but--" he shook his head. "It's risky."

Vax turned his attention to Kash. "Whatever the risks are, I'll bear them. Anything you need me to do. Just... bring her back. Please."

Kash lowered his chin, long hair falling in a curtain around his face. "You can't. You can aid in the ritual -- you and two others -- but the risk of calling Vesh is all on me. But thanks for the offer. All right, give me a minute. I need to set up the ritual. I'll let you know when I'm ready." He set down his pack and began shuffling through for the necessary components. 

He should have waited, he knew, for Kash’s word to start the ritual. Kash was trained in such things; Vax was just an idiot with nimble fingers and a couple of daggers. But instead of waiting, Vax cupped his hands around Vex's cheeks, closed his eyes, and began to pray. 

Vax had never prayed to the Raven Queen before, and knew only the barest of facts about her: goddess of the transition between life and death, patron to the Grey Wardens, enemy of the undead. Once she’d been a mortal woman, made divine by winning a great battle and claiming the ultimate power. How did you ask someone like that for a favor? Vex knew more -- she had found the book that had let them to this place, the final resting place of the Raven Queen’s last champion. If only she... 

He couldn't think about that, couldn't let the tears and grief in. Not yet. He would bring her back. Had to bring her back. 

"Take me." He spoke in a harsh whisper, all his fury at the goddess and at Percival and at the universe held in that tiny controlled space. "Leave her alone. Take me instead, you raven bitch! If a sacrifice is demanded, I'll make it. Just let her live. Please. Please."

He screwed his eyes more tightly shut and focused on the words, on the promise, on the feel of Vex's soft cheeks beneath his hands. And alone in the darkness, a gentle voice came into his mind.

"You are sure? Do you understand what you're asking?"

"I don't care. Whatever the price is, I'll pay it. Even if it means I die instead. As long as you let Vex'ahlia be."

A soft chuckle. "In death, sacrifice. This is what the Grey Wardens say. But you will live, for now, if you’re strong enough. I wonder if you are?" A pause. "Very well, Vax'ildan. I accept your offer. You will be my champion, my chosen. And your sister will live, and understand the sacrifice you made." The presence withdrew, and everything went quiet and still. Vax held his breath, didn't dare to open his eyes, the moment between one heartbeat and the next stretching out into eternity.

And then a red light rose up even in the darkness, washing over and through him, drowning him in a crimson wave.

-x-

Kash finished laying out the runes for the ritual, then held out his hand, a diamond glittering in his palm. Percy had pulled chips of residuum from his pocket and laid them on Vex's chest -- perhaps they would intensify whatever magic Kash could call. Zahra, too, had relinquished her magic stone, laying the moonstone from her staff at Vex's feet. Vax had not moved, but otherwise all eyes were on Kash, as he closed his eyes and steeled himself for the dark touch of Vesh’s power.

But before she could answer, before anyone could react, a cloud of red mist rose from Vex. The same cloud that had risen from the sarcophagus, the cloud that Percy had avoided, but this time it was controlled, gathering itself into a ball -- and then it shot into Vax, blasting him up into the air before smacking him into the wall.

-x-

Time stopped, then started again, as everything happened at once: Vex's eyes flying open as she sat up with a gasp. Kash dropping the diamond with a shout. Keyleth screaming and running to Vax's side. Percy fell to his knees and put a hand on Vex's shoulder. The black veins had receded from her neck and the color was already returning to her cheeks, and Percy took a real breath for the first time in over a minute. "Vex! Are you all right?"

"I... I think so." She put a hand up to her forehead. "Goodness, I feel woozy. What happened? Why am I on the floor? Where's Vax?" 

She started to get up, but Percy held her in place. "He's all right," he half-lied, glancing over his shoulder to where Vax lay crumpled on the floor, Keyleth's hands on his arm. He seemed to be breathing, so at least it seemed they hadn't traded one dead twin for another. Percy turned his attention to Vex, meeting her eyes. "You need to rest," he said, pulling a healing potion out of his pouch. "Here, take this, and I'll go find out what's going on. Trinket?" Trinket, who had not moved from Vex's side, looked up at Percy. "You keep an eye on her; I'll be right back."

Trinket let out a small huffing sound; Percy could swear that he nodded. Then he put his head in Vex's lap, and she curled a hand around his ear. Percy uncorked the potion and handed it to her, then made his way to Keyleth and Vax. Kash was there, too -- hand on Vax's forehead, eyes closed -- and so was Zahra; Zahra looked at Percy, eyes wide. "Is she..."

"Weak, but alive," Percy said. "How's Vax?"

"The same." Kash responded without opening his eyes. "I have no idea how this is even possible, but somehow the Blight poisoning has transferred itself to him. It wasn't instantly deadly, but it will still kill him in time. There's no cure for the Blight."

Keyleth took in a sharp breath and pulled away. "No. No. You're lying. There is, there must be--"

Percy swallowed, considered his options, made a choice. "That might not be entirely true."

Keyleth grabbed his arm, and Kash opened his eyes. "What?"

"Yes, what?" Beneath them all, Vax stirred, opened his eyes, sat up. "Ooof, I have a terrible headache. Is Vex...."

"Alive, yes," Percy said. "But--"

His next words were lost as Vax clambered to his feet, shaking off Keyleth's hand and pushing Percy aside to grab his sister in an embrace.

-x-

Vex had waited only long enough for Percy to turn his back before scratching Trinket between the ears and gently pushing his snout aside. Then she got to her feet and looked around, immediately noting the crowd of people around the figure lying prone on the floor. "Vax," she murmured to herself, and began to walk -- why were her feet so unsteady? Had she hit her head hard when she fell off the sarcophagus? Hard enough to knock her out, anyway. Although her head didn't hurt. She was tired, but nothing hurt.

She had no more time to think as Vax lunged upward and launched himself at her, hugging her fiercely. She hugged him back, laughing. "Brother, please, enough, I can't breathe." But he didn't let go, so she relaxed into the embrace, laying her head on his shoulder. "It's all right. Look, I'm fine." He shuddered, and she pulled away in surprise. "Are you-- crying?"

Tears had indeed pooled in his eyes, one falling down his right cheek. "You were dead," he said.

Vex laughed again. "From that little fall? Surely not. Surely..." she pulled away a little more, looked around at the group, noting tears on Keyleth's and Zahra's cheeks, Grog's furrowed brow, Percy's face even paler than usual. "But how--"

"There was some sort of trap on the sarcophagus," Vax said, and he looked over at Percy, with a rapid flash of fury. Then he was looking back at her, all gentleness again, as he brushed a finger over her cheek. "By the time I made it up from the pit, you were already gone. But Kash brought you back."

"Well." Kash cleared his throat. "Not exactly. I was going to. But then I didn't need to." He opened his hand, and an intact diamond lay on his palm, twinkling in the torchlight.

Vax went limp in her arms, and Vex crumpled down with him, the two of them settling together on the floor, arms still around each other. "But then--" She swallowed, looked at Kash, back to Vax. "How?"

Vax lowered his eyes, looked away from her, and said nothing; she placed a hand on his cheek and turned him back. "Vax," she said sternly. "What did you do?"

"I'd like to know that too," Kash said. "I've never seen anything quite like it."

Vex tried to catch Vax's eye again, but he still refused. So she let him go and stood up and put her sternest glare on the rest of the group. "Would someone please tell me what the fuck just happened?!"

Percy cleared his throat and stepped forward. "We-- or rather, I..." A spot of color appeared on his cheeks, and he looked away from her, eyes to the ceiling. "I opened the sarcophagus, and a cloud of red mist came out. I avoided it, but you did not, and next I knew, you were on the floor, not breathing." He swallowed hard, finally met her eyes. "I called everyone over, Vax put his head in your lap and closed his eyes, and Kash started preparing a resurrection ritual. But before he could fully start, the red mist rose up from you and into Vax." He nodded in her brother's direction. "With some force, enough to knock him into the wall. And then you-- woke up." 

Kash knelt back down at Vax's side and laid two fingers on his neck, taking his pulse. "Steady," he said, leaning back on his heels. He glanced up at Vex. "You still seem weak, though. Here." He got up and touched her arm, and Vex felt the warmth of healing spread through her. "You'll be fine. Your brother, on the other hand..." He shook his head at Percy. "I don't care what rumors you've heard, there's no cure for the Blight."

"And yet I saw it happen." Percy stood straighter. "That's what I was starting to tell you. Once, when I was a boy, we had an outbreak of darkspawn near Whitestone. Our guards tried to fight them off, but some were exposed to the taint. Most of them died before the Grey Wardens arrived to help us, but they took one of the survivors in. And she left with them, seemingly as healthy as she was before the attack." He shook his head. "I don't know how it works, or what they do. But they saved her life. I know that for certain."

Vex looked back and forth between Percy and Kash, then focused on Vax. It was impossible; everyone knew the Blight was a death sentence. But she had survived it, somehow. Maybe Vax would too. "Then I suppose it's time to go find some Grey Wardens. Good thing we're in the Deep Roads." She held a hand out to Vax. "Brother?"

Vax took her outstretched hand and got to his feet. He didn't let go, but he still wouldn't look at her. "Anything else we need to do here?"

Percy gestured toward the sarcophagus. "If nothing else, we should get what we came for. The armor, and the dagger." He walked up the steps, and Vex followed, pulling a reluctant Vax behind her. The corpse had disappeared, leaving only the empty armor lying in the sarcophagus, the dagger resting on the chest, half-obscuring the Grey Warden sigil. Percy started to reach for it; Vax suddenly sprung up close, pushing Vex aside as he slapped Percy's hand away.

"Have you learned nothing?" he snapped. Percy lowered his eyes and stepped back, and Vax stood alone at the edge of the sarcophagus, looking down at the armor, breathing heavily.

-x-

Vex laid a tentative hand on Vax's shoulder, but he shook it off. Here it was, the armor that Vex had died for, that he might still die for. And he didn't want any part of it. He wanted to turn back time and never come on this fucking quest. But it was too late for that. The soft voice in the distance told him so. "My champion's armor," she murmured. "Will you wear it, and claim your destiny?"

He pushed the voice away and looked closely at rim of the sarcophagus, at the edge of the lid. There it was -- the mechanism that had triggered the trap, a simple catch and release that he could have easily disarmed, if only Percival had given him two minutes to look for it. He snorted and shot a hard glare at Percy, who still looked upset and embarrassed. Good; if Vax had his way, Percy would never stop regretting that mistake. 

"It's clean," he said. "No other traps, although I can't guarantee there's no enchantments."

"I'll look," Zahra said. She joined Vax and held a hand over the armor, eyes closed. "The armor is clean," she murmured, "with strong enchantments I can't entirely describe, but..." She fell silent, then pulled away quickly, opening her eyes to look at Vax. "There's something I don't like about that dagger. It's made of lyrium, for one thing -- not enchanted with lyrium. Solid lyrium. I don't think that's safe. If we had a dwarf here, then perhaps. But as it is--" She shook her head. "On the other hand, I hate to leave something so powerful just lying about."

"Would it be safe in the Bag of Holding?" Percy asked.

Zahra shrugged. "As anywhere," she replied. "But do not leave it too long."

"Got it." Grog jogged up the steps, pulled the dagger out of the sarcophagus, and tossed it in the bag. "How about the armor?"

Silence fell for a moment. "I wasn't expecting it to be stamped with the sigil of the Grey Wardens," Vex finally said. "I would feel odd wearing it. As if I were an imposter." She looked at Vax. "Would you like it?"

Vax stared at the armor for a moment. It seemed sized to fit him perfectly. A cruel joke, if so. "Let's just put it in the bag, for now."

"Okay." Grog stuffed the armor in the bag and closed it up before slinging it over his shoulder. "Anything else?"

"We need to rest," Vex said.

"Not here," Vax replied flatly. "There was a cave-in off the last junction. That should be safe enough." Without another word, he turned his back on everyone and everything in the room, ready to leave this day and this place behind him.

-x-

Vox Machina reached the alcove after only a few minutes of walking, and they settled down to make camp. The night -- if it was night, it was hard to tell in the Deep Roads -- passed quietly in the alcove: Grog taking first watch alone, followed by Scanlan and Zahra, and then Percy and Kima volunteered to take the last. 

They sat without speaking for a long time, the only sound the breathing of their sleeping companions and the soft whisking of Kima's whetstone as she sharpened her axe, then two daggers. Shortly into the second hour, Kima finally set her weapons aside and looked askance at Percy.

"You're quiet," she said.

"Am I, any more than usual?"

"Yup," she said. "I suppose it makes sense, though, since you screwed up more than usual."

Percy had been sitting with his back to the wall, elbows propped on his knees; now he scooted around enough to face Kima. "And precisely how much do I usually screw up?" He glanced at his pistol, never far from his hip. "As you know, that bar is set rather high."

Kima also looked at the gun, then shrugged. "That's fair," she said. "But, well. I don't know much about the Raven Queen, but I don't think 'forgiving' is high on the list of words that describe her. And although I can't say exactly what Vax did, to get that Blight poisoning out of Vex and into him, the Raven Queen has to have been involved. Her champion's sarcophagus, the patron of the Grey Wardens... what else could it be?"

"You could be right," Percy said. "You're the Templar; I leave the theology to you."

Kima snorted. "It's not really my specialty either. I can pray, I can swing a sword, do a little magic. The deep thinking, I leave to my Knight-Commander and the priests." She leaned back against the wall with a sigh. "Anyway. I hope you're right about the Wardens being able to help him. I've seen Blight poisoning. It's not an easy death."

Percy closed his eyes and set his head back against the stone wall and let silence take him again. He had to be right about the Wardens. He didn't think he could bear the consequences of being wrong.

-x-

Of all the things Vex hated about the Deep Roads, the difficulty of tracking was near the top of the list. The ancient stone walkways rarely showed footprints or other signs of passage; the darkspawn tunnels were so fouled by the method of their creation that it could be hard to tell what was fresh. But as soon as she woke that morning, she scoured the corridor outside the alcove for any sign of passing that might have been caused by Grey Wardens.

Finally, she found it -- a footprint in a small pile of dirt, from a boot sized to be elf or human, not matching the treads of anyone in their party. Before long she noticed three others, plus a place where someone had brushed cobwebs off the wall. "There," she said, pointing. 

Scanlan came over and looked at the footprint. "Are you sure?"

"Darkspawn don't wear shoes, and it's too large to be a dwarf. I won't say it must be Grey Wardens, beyond any doubt. But it seems more likely than not."

"Which way are they going?"

"Further in," Vex replied. "And it's fresh. They must have passed while we slept."

"All right." Scanlan raised his voice to the rest of the group. "Are we ready to head out?" No one objected, and he nodded to Vex. "Lead the way, then."

-x-

Walking was slow and tortuous, each step heavier than the last. Vax had never wanted to see the sun so badly, and yet he shrank from each ancient torch they passed, the light piercing his eyes and adding to the headache that throbbed in his temples. One step, another, another. Was this suffering the sacrifice the Raven Queen demanded? It didn't sound like she had meant for him to just die here, alone and unremarked, no service performed for her. But he didn't pretend to understand the ways of gods, and it didn't matter anyway. He'd gone in with the expectation of trading a life for a life, and it appeared this was the fate that awaited. Lost in these thoughts, his foot caught at a loose tile; he stumbled, then fell, landing face-forward with a thud, just barely keeping his face out of the dirt.

"Enough," he murmured to himself. "I'm sorry, everyone." And he closed his eyes.

-x-

Vex threw out an arm the moment she saw Vax falling, but not quickly enough to catch him. He face-planted on the ground, and she knelt down beside him. "Vax? Vax!" She rolled him over; his eyes had closed, and his skin was pale, covered in a sheen of sweat. "Vax, you have to wake up, please. Now, please." She shook his shoulders. "Please wake up."

Groaning, he opened his eyes; they glittered bright with pain and fever. When had they gotten so sunken, so hollow? "I'm sorry, sister," he murmured. "It hurts, and I'm so tired."

"I know, darling, but we can't stop here. The Grey Wardens are just ahead of us, I'm sure of it." She checked the dirt again, saw the tracks as clear as day. "Can someone run ahead?"

"I can take eagle form." Keyleth said. "Scanlan?"

"Sure," he said. She murmured the words and transformed into a giant eagle, and Scanlan hopped up on her back. "We'll get back as fast as we can," he said. "But you should keep moving."

"Right." Vex nudged her brother. "C'mon, get up." She wrapped an arm around his waist, and he laid his arm over her shoulder, and together they stood, Vex groaning under his near-dead weight. "Trinket, come here. Grog, can you help me?" Between the two of them, they wrangled Vax onto Trinket's back, and the party started moving again, Vax's arms twined around Trinket's neck, Vex walking next to them with a hand on Vax's leg just in case he started to slip, her eyes on him the entire time.

-x-

No doubt, flying was faster than walking had been, especially given the need for the larger group to keep pace with a faltering Vax. Scanlan tossed a glance over his shoulder, but the team was long out of sight, even after only ten minutes of travel. He only hoped the walk back could be accomplished as quickly.

Only a few moments later, a group of travelers came into view. Even from the back, it was clear these were Grey Wardens: dressed in blue and silver, armed to the teeth, spattered in fluids he didn't even want to name. He leaned forward so he could talk into Keyleth's ear. "There!"

Keyleth cawed in response, then glided over the party's heads to land in front of them. The troupe stopped dead as Scanlan hopped off her back, and then she transformed behind him. "Good day, honored Grey Wardens," he said with a bow. "We are here toward a common goal, and to reach that goal we need your aid."

The Wardens glanced at each other, then back to Scanlan. "We're on an errand of some importance," said one, an elven man with Dalish markings and dark hair, "given the current situation with the darkspawn. But we will help if we can. What do you need?"

Scanlan bowed. "I thank you, sir. My name is Scanlan Shorthalt, and I am the leader of an adventuring party -- Vox Machina, by name. We came down to the Deep Roads in search of an ancient thaig, said to be the resting place of Raven Queen's last champion."

A tall human man standing directly behind the elf started, then exchanged a swift glance with a female dwarf, who raised her eyebrows. The male elf -- the leader, by all appearances -- held a hand out by his side and barely shook his head. "Interesting," was all he said. "Go on."

"We found the tomb, and after a terrific battle with a darkspawn troupe, we were victorious. However, the sarcophagus was trapped, and one of our number, a bold young fighter called Vax'ildan, was infected with Blight sickness." A simplification of the situation, but to tell the full story would take too long and raise too many questions. Scanlan cast his eyes down and let out a sigh of real grief -- they'd almost lost Vex, still might lose Vax; easy enough to play up the feeling. "One of our number is of the understanding that you might be able to help."

This time there was no mistaking the meaningful glances sent the elf's way, but he seemed to pay little attention. "Your companion is not wrong," he said slowly, "but it is not aid that we can offer to just anyone. And he may be sorry to have accepted it."

Behind him, Scanlan heard Keyleth suck in a sharp breath; before she could retort, he gestured her to keep calm. She let out an impatient sigh, but otherwise stayed silent. "Of course. Everyone knows that the Grey Wardens are a secretive order. If you keep the cure to Blight sickness to yourself, I can only presume that you have a good reason. I don't ask for any commitment now, only that you come take a look, see if there is anything you can do. I imagine that your errand is some work against the new darkspawn uprising; I assure you, this is our cause as well, and if you help us revive our companion, he will be a valuable asset in this fight."

The elf nodded. "Give us a moment." He turned, and his crew gathered around him, falling into quiet conversation.

Scanlan stepped back to give them space and took Keyleth's hand. She squeezed back, hard. "Thank you," he murmured -- it had surely been difficult for her not to burst out with demands for their help. But Scanlan had dealt with Grey Wardens a few times, and demands rarely went well with them. Gentle requests were always best.

They were still holding hands, Keyleth starting to tremble, when the elf turned his attention back to them. "All right," he said. "We will help, if we can, in exchange for information -- anything you can tell us about the thaig you found, including it's location." He half-smiled. "Because our errands in this part of the Deep Roads had more in common than you might have guessed."

Scanlan let go of Keyleth's hand, and bowed again. "Thank you, sir-- may I ask your name?"

"Loral", the elf said. The name was oddly familiar, though Scanlan couldn't immediately place it. "Which way?"

"Back the way you came," Scanlan replied. "We've been tracking you for half the day, but with our companion's illness catching up seemed unlikely."

"Hence the eagle," said another warden, also a Dalish elf, this one a woman. 

Loral nodded. "That was smart of you. It sounds like we may not have much time. Shall we?"

Scanlan took Keyleth's hand again and pulled her down the path, quick as his gnome legs could take him.

-x-

Loral Mahariel followed the gnome and his half-elven companion. The woman had not said a word, but she was clearly frantic with worry. He wished he had better news for them.

It was strange, being in this position. And the meaningful looks that Nathaniel and Sigrun kept trying to send him were of no help. Yes, how ironic, that he of all people might conscript someone to save them from Blight sickness. Well, he wasn't going to conscript anyone. It would be by the other's choice, or not at all. Today, from this distance, after all that had happened, Loral was hard pressed to regret being forced into the Grey Wardens. And yet it was still not the choice he would have made. This Vax'ildan would know what he was getting into. 

The groups walked in silence, the gnome and the half-elf leading the way, hand in hand. Loral and Nathaniel walked together behind them, Loral's mabari Assan at his heels, Velanna in the middle with the two dwarves at the back. Normally, Loral preferred quiet, but something about this silence was unnerving -- normally, Sigrun and Oghren would keep chattering about one thing or another, Nathaniel and Velanna chiming in as they felt moved, and between his loud purple outfit and the musical instruments slung across his back, this Scanlan didn't really strike Loral as the silent type either. But the oppressive mood stuck with them as they walked, about half an hour passing before they rounded a bend in the tunnel and came out into a well-lit corridor. From there, Loral could see the other group approaching. A large band, from the look of it, including a red-skinned tiefling, a goliath looming over the others, and what looked like a full-sized grizzly bear. 

"Is that your party?" Loral asked.

Scanlan glanced over his shoulder. "Yes. The one who needs you is riding on the bear." He let go of the half-elf's hand. "Keyleth, you take him -- I'll catch up."

The woman nodded, then made eye contact with Loral for the first time. "This way." And she took off running, even though the other party was at most a hundred yards away. Loral followed; he could hear Nathaniel a step behind him. The woman -- Keyleth -- reached the bear's side, and then Loral could see the person lying on its back, weakly lifting his head. Keyleth ran a finger along his cheek, then turned back to Loral. "Here," she said, "and come quickly."

By the time she had finished speaking, Loral was already at their side, as Keyleth helped the other man sit up. He, too, was elf-blooded, but with a look of a city elf rather than the Dalish -- now that Loral was closer to Keyleth, he could see the faint marking of vasilian on her forehead and cheek. Loral put a hand on the blighted man's arm. Vax'ildan, the gnome had called him. "You are Vax'ildan?"

"Vax," the man said. His voice was rough, and his eyes were sunken, but he had not yet developed the dark bruising indicative of late Blight poisoning. Not too late, then -- but it couldn't wait for long. Certainly Vax couldn't wait the weeks it had taken Loral to undertake the Joining. Days, perhaps. 

"I am Loral," he said, "Warden-Commander of Amaranthine. And I am sorry for your condition, but surely you know not to get so close to darkspawn?"

"It wasn't like that," said the woman who stood on the other side of the bear. Another half elf, and she looked so much like Vax'ildan that there was no chance of mistaking her for anything but his sister. "It is a very long story, which we will tell once you help my brother."

"Yes, about that." Loral looked at Vax. "I don't know how you knew to seek our aid. Most people believe the Blight is invariably fatal. And it is, but the Grey Wardens do have a cure, of sorts. Yet this fact is a closely-held secret, outside our order, and I wonder how you came to know it."

"That was my doing, I'm afraid." A human man with white hair stepped forward. "Some of your order came to my father's lands when I was a boy. One of our guards was infected with the Blight, but when the darkspawn incursion was cleared out, she left with the Wardens, apparently as well as she ever had been. So, though I could not be certain..." He spread his hands, and smiled. "Well, it seemed worth the chance to seek you out."

"That's fair." Loral returned to Vax. "Well, it's true. I can give you a chance. But only a chance, and with a price to be paid. The only way I can save you is to make you a Grey Warden."

"A Grey Warden?" The sister's eyebrows shot up. "You mean, he'd have to join you? You can't just give him the cure and go your separate ways?"

Loral shook his head. "Believe me, I'd be the first person to make that exception to our rules if I thought I could." He straightened for a moment. "I need a moment alone with Vax, please."

The sister crossed her arms with a scowl. "I'm not going anywhere," she said.

Scanlan touched her hand. "Vex."

She shook him off. "He's my brother," she said. "Whatever you have to tell him--"

"Vex'ahlia." Vax raised a hand to her cheek and lightly stroked it. "Vex. It's all right. Go. I won't make any decisions without talking to you."

The sister -- Vex'ahlia -- stared hard at him. "You promise?"

"I promise," Vax murmured. She took his hand and squeezed it, and then she stepped away, gently pulling Keyleth with her. Keyleth followed, but her eyes never left Vax. Loral watched the women with a pang of recognition at their expressions, mirroring the bleakness he'd seen on his own clan mates' faces as he'd left with Duncan, so many years ago. Where were Merrill and Marethiri now? Did they ever think of him? Did they even know that he'd survived? 

He allowed the rare moment of nostalgia to pass before coming closer to Vax, still perched on the back of the bear. "Most of what I'm about to tell you are well-guarded secrets of the Grey Wardens, in theory not to be shared with anyone outside the order. Some of this is told to people before they decide to join, but much of it is not. I understand their reasons, but I don't agree with them. You see, I became a Grey Warden because I, too, had Blight poisoning. And I wasn't given much of a choice in the matter. I refuse to do the same to you." He placed a hand on Vax's shoulder and looked straight into his eyes. "I could, if I wanted. As Warden Commander, I could invoke the right of conscription, force you into the Order to save your life. But I'm not going to do that. This will be your choice, made freely and with all the information I can give you."

Vax closed his eyes and lowered his chin with a soft sigh. "Thank you."

Loral let out a hard chuckle. "You may not feel the same once this is over, either way." 

"When did the universe ever give us easy choices?" Vax opened his eyes. "All right. Tell me what you have to tell."

-x-

Both groups pulled away a few yards down the corridor, enough space to give Vax and the Warden-Commander their privacy. Vox Machina and their friends clustered around a torch burning on the wall, while the Grey Wardens gathered together a few feet away, talking in low voices. Percy considered his friends for a moment, thought about walking to Vex's side in hopes of comforting her, but what could he possibly say to her? This was all his fault, after all. Besides, she was surrounded by Keyleth, Zahra, and Scanlan; they would probably do a better job of keeping her company.

So instead he watched the Grey Wardens. He'd been fascinated by the Wardens as long as he could remember -- their history, their heroics, the legends that had sprung up around them. But except for the one incident in his boyhood, he'd never had much opportunity to interact with them. To run into them in the Deep Roads, to be depending on them for help, was like something out of a story.

A story... Percy looked at the Wardens, and then back to Vax and Loral. Warden-Commander of Amaranthine -- Percy knew Amaranthine; it was an arling not too far from Whitestone, also sworn ultimately to the Teyrn of Highever, but after the Fourth Blight it had been given to the Grey Wardens, in the care of... "The Hero of Ferelden!"

Several eyes turned toward him, and only then did Percy realize he'd spoken out loud. "Loral. The Warden-Commander." He turned toward the other Wardens. "I'm right, aren't I? He's the Hero of Ferelden."

The Wardens exchanged glances, and then the human man nodded. "The same," he replied. 

Scanlan slapped his forehead. "I knew that name sounded familiar!"

The man chuckled. "I'm not surprised you've heard of him. But he doesn't like to speak of it, or receive special treatment. Best to leave it alone."

"All right." Percy crossed his arms and looked at the elf with new eyes. He would do his best not to overreact. But still, quite a thing it would be, if Vax were to join the Grey Wardens as a companion of the Hero of Ferelden.

-x-

Vax let his head fall forward as he absorbed everything that Loral had just told him. It was a great deal of information, most of it unwelcome. About the only thing that weighed on the positive side of the scale of becoming a Warden was that he would not die tomorrow. To give up Vox Machina, his sister, the dream of a future with Keyleth... "Were this choice not forced on me, it is one I would never make," he said.

"I entirely understand," Loral said. "The truth is, when I was in your position, I would have said no, if I'd been given the option. I would have stayed with my clan to die. But standing here, with you now, I can't quite say I regret it. As a Warden, I make a difference in the world. Maybe someone else would have stepped up in my place; maybe not. I'll never know." He shrugged. "I know Wardens who were conscripted and found their calling in the Order, a home they'd never expected. I know others who never stopped regretting their fate. I can't even guess which way you would go."

"That's fair. Indeed, you have been more than fair." Vax forced himself to sit upright. "I need a little time to decide, if I have it."

"A little," Loral said. "You probably have a few days left. Not much more. Perhaps as long as a week. But I wouldn't recommend taking that long. A day or two." He stood up straighter. "I've told you things that a potential recruit to the Wardens wouldn't know until after the Joining. Normally I'd feel obligated to caution you against saying much to your sister, or anyone else you need to discuss the decision with. But I've never been fond of keeping secrets. One of the ways in which I'm not an ideal Warden." He smiled slightly. "But they're stuck with me, and they accepted a long time ago that I'll do things my way, or not at all."

Vax found himself smiling back. This Loral seemed a good fellow. If he went through with this, he could do a lot worse in a commanding officer. "I appreciate that." He took a deep breath and climbed off Trinket's back, steading himself against the solid furry flank. "I'd like a moment, please."

"Of course." Loral nodded as he stepped back and away, leaving Vax alone with Trinket, and much to consider.

He turned to look at the others. They had all gathered together, Vox Machina and Grey Wardens alike, mostly in silence although Percival seemed to have struck up a conversation with the tall human Warden. He had the look of nobility; no doubt he and Freddie had plenty to talk about. But for that observation, Vax mostly kept his attention on his own friends and companions. Vex and Keyleth sat together, holding hands, Zahra close behind them; Keyleth stared at the ground but Vex was clearly watching him. He caught her eye, and she winked. If Vax were another sort of man, he might have burst into tears, right then. But he pushed the feelings away and down, just like always, and turned his attention back to Loral.

"Thank you, again, for being straight with me. Now it's my turn to be honest." He took a deep breath before continuing. "If it were just me and my bad luck to be infected with Blight, then I'd say no and make my peace with death." Vax closed his eyes. The resonant voice was silent, but the vision of the porcelain face remained clear in his mind. "But it's not that simple." Opening his eyes, he looked straight at Loral. "You see, I wasn't the one to have an encounter with Blight poisoning, initially. It was my sister. And as she lay dead on the ground, I made a bargain with your patron. She hasn't said it in so many words, but now the deal is clear to me: she spares Vex's life, and I become a Grey Warden. If I turned you down..." He glanced over his shoulder at Vex with a hard swallow. "I worry."

Loral nodded slowly. "The Raven Queen is not warm or welcoming, as gods go, but she is fair, never capricious or cruel. A life for a life does seem like her sort of thing. I wish I could think of some other way to help you fulfill your bargain. But I suspect you're right." He glanced over at his shoulder at Vex. "I don't expect the Raven Queen would instantly smite your sister down if you refused the Joining. But I don't think either of you would be happy with the outcome."

Vax barked out a harsh laugh. "Vex won't be happy no matter what happens next. I can promise you that." 

Loral nodded again, with sympathy this time. "At least our errands in the Deep Roads seem to be similar. We can travel together for a time. But after that..." He shook his head. "I suppose we could talk about your sister or other companions joining the Wardens--"

"No!" Vax somehow found enough energy to grab Loral by the shoulders and force their eyes to meet. "No. This is not the life Vex would want. And Keyleth has other obligations. I will not force either of them to make that choice."

"It sounds as if you've made your decision," Loral said.

Vax let go with a sigh. "I suppose I have." He turned to Trinket and tightened his grip on the coarse fur. "What do you say, Trinks?" 

Trinket looked up at him, eyes mournful; Vax wondered as always just how much the bear. He grunted, and Vax smiled at him. "Right. Let's go talk to Vex."

He walked slowly toward the group, still using Trinket for balance. Vex had gotten to her feet ,and she stood between Keyleth and Zahra, eyes never leaving him. "Sister," he said softly, then turned to Keyleth. "Keyleth. Speak with me a moment? Alone?" 

The others melted into the background, only Scanlan casting a pained look over his shoulder. Vax reached out and took Vex's hand, then Keyleth's. For a moment they stood in silence, and then Vex cleared her throat. "Well, brother? What did the Grey Warden have to say?"

"Many things," Vax replied. "But only one that truly matters. Unless I become a Grey Warden, I will die, in a matter of days. And that means becoming a Grey Warden, fully. I've been convinced of that." He let go of Vex's hand and touched her face. "I don't want to leave you." He looked at Keyleth; she would not catch his eye. "Either of you. Any of you. But if it's that or death..." He lowered his chin, let his hair fall in his face. "I don't see that there's much choice."

Vex put a hand under his chin and tipped it up. "Then I go with you."

"No." Vax leaned away. "No. I will not ask or allow that of either of you. Keyleth..."

"I can't," Keyleth said flatly. "I know that. I can't be Keeper and a Grey Warden both. A few Dalish have left the clans to serve with honor. That man--" she nodded toward Loral -- "perhaps the most honored among them. But I would have to give up my role, and I can't do that." She yanked her hand free and stood., then bowed with a stiff formality. "You've made your choice, and I must do the same." 

With that, she walked away, leaving Vax's heart shattered behind her. He swallowed hard, then turned his attention back to Vex. "I'm sorry, sister," he murmured.

Her eyes filled with tears. "There is really no other way?"

Vax shook his head. "I wish there were. So does the Warden. But he made the choice clear. I can stay with you and die, or go with them and live."

A tear tracked down her cheek. "And I lose you either way."

Vax's heart broke in full as he flung his arms around Vex and pulled her tight. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm so sorry."

And they sat together, held each other, and wept.

-x-

"Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that cannot be forsworn. And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day we shall join you."

There had been no point in waiting any longer, once the decision was made and Vax was able to tear himself away from his sister's arms. He had left her behind -- at Loral's insistence, only Grey Wardens would be present at the Joining ceremony -- and slowly, but under his own power, he had followed the others around a curve in the path to a nook out of sight of Vox Machina. A few minutes had passed while Loral had prepared the ritual; the words spoken, he handed Vax a heavy silver chalice. And then he stepped back with the rest of the group, who stood in a semi-circle around him, and waited.

Vax had not even learned the names of the others yet, and so he spared them no attention. Instead he looked into the chalice, swirled the rich red liquid around the bowl. Darkspawn blood and lyrium, a potent brew, pungent and rotted and sharp. He lifted his eyes to the ceiling and lifted the chalice in ironic salute, to the Wardens, to Vox Machina, to himself, but most of all to the Raven Queen. "Fuck you, and your bargains too," he muttered, and then he closed his eyes before downing the liquid in a single gulp.

His lips went numb at the touch of the cup, and then pain exploded behind his eyes: pain, images of darkspawn, the roar of a dragon, two dragons, three, finally the red monster Thordak howling and taunting as a city fell down around his ears. Then the face of the Raven Queen appeared porcelain white behind the dragon in the sky, and every other image faded until only the visage of the goddess remained, her mouth turned into a small mysterious smile. "Welcome home, my champion." And then her face and her voice, too, faded away, until Vax knew nothing at all.

-x-

An hour passed, then two. No one spoke much. Grog built a fire; Zahra and Kash made some dinner; Percy gently took Vex and Keyleth by the hands and pulled them away from the edge of camp and into the center, by the fire. They dutifully sat down together their backs resting against the wall.

Three hours had passed before Loral returned, alone. Vex leapt to her feet, letting her uneaten bowl of soup spill to the ground and reached him before he reached the fire. "So?" she demanded.

Loral nodded. "Your brother lives," he said. "He's resting now, but once he awakens he'll be fine."

Vex let out a shuddering breath; before she could collapse, she felt a steady hand on around her arm, holding her up: Keyleth. "Thank the Maker," she gasped, and then she turned to Keyleth and grabbed her in a hug. "He's alive."

"So he is," Keyleth murmured. "I'm-- glad."

"So glad!" Vex hugged Keyleth harder as a few more tears slipped down her cheeks. She hoped this was the last of it; she was so tired of crying. Wiping her eyes, she looked at Loral. "Can I see him?"

Loral nodded. "Follow me."

-x-

Slowly, Vax drifted back into awareness, the inky blackness fading into gray and then the dim red of firelight through closed eyelids. He became aware that he was lying down, surrounded by a pile of soft furs, with a hand gently gripping his. Opening his eyes, he turned his head to see Vex sitting next to him, holding his hand, blinking back tears.

"You're awake," she said. "How do you feel?"

"Fine," Vax replied, more or less automatically, and then he paused to take actual inventory. The bone-deep fatigue was gone, replaced by an odd pulse of vitality. He did feel fine, he realized. More than fine. Like he could leap out of this bed right now and run a hundred miles without stopping. Except he would need to eat first. He placed a hand on his suddenly-growling stomach. "Is there anything to eat?"

He heard a soft chuckle and turned his head in the direction of the sound. It was the human male Warden, sitting in the opposite corner of the tent. "Grey Warden appetite already kicking in, I see," he said.

Vax sat up. "Loral did mention that particular side effect." 

"You may not always have the best food on the road, but there will always be plenty of it." The man caught Vex's eye. "You're welcome to join us for dinner, if you like."

"Of course." Vex looked at Vax and squeezed his hand, then let go to wipe her cheeks, then hold her hand out to the Warden. "Vex'ahlia," she said.

The man accepted the shake with a small bow. "Nathaniel Howe, at your service." He let go, then reached to give Vax a hand up. 

Vax accepted and got to his feet. "Vax'ildan. But call me Vax."

Nathaniel nodded. "Welcome to the Grey Wardens, brother." He made his way to the exit, then caught their eye. "Dinner will be ready shortly. Come join us whenever you're ready."

Once they were alone, Vex hugged Vax more closely. "You really are all right?"

"I am," Vax said. "In truth, I feel better than I ever have. Stronger. Hardier. The main effects of the Joining, or so I've been told. That, and the appetite." His stomach made a burbling noise, and he felt his cheeks redden as Vex giggled. "We'll see if it lasts."

Vex nodded. "Do you know who their commander is?" Vax shook his head. "It's Loral Mahariel, the Hero of Ferelden."

Vax started. "Truly?" He stared at the closed tent flap. "No one said anything to me."

"Percy figured it out," Vex said. "I suppose that means you're in good hands." She looked down, then back up at him. "So, will you try out the armor now? Seeing as you're a Grey Warden and all."

"Isn't it still in the bag of holding?" Vax asked.

Vex shook her head. "I asked Grog to give it to me before I came here." She patted the satchel that he only now noticed bulging at her hip. "If anyone has earned the right to wear it, it's you."

Vax glared at the bag. It was the last thing he wanted, and yet... "Just.. leave it. I'll decide in the morning."

-x-

Dinner was a quiet affair, the Grey Wardens plus Vex gathered around the campfire. Vax finally learned the other Wardens' names -- the dwarves were Sigrun and Oghren, the female elf Velanna -- and along with Nathaniel they carried the conversation for the evening, telling stories about their adventures in the Deep Roads and the first year after the end of the last Blight. Vex nodded along and asked questions, but Vax mostly sat back and listened, learning as much as he could about the personalities and histories of his new companions.

As he observed, he noted that Loral seemed to be doing much the same, perched on a downed column some distance from the fire, contributing little to the conversation. Quietly, he stood up and made his way over to Loral's side. "They seem a good crew," he said.

Loral glanced sideways up at him. "They are," he replied. "A little unruly at times, but solid all the same. I wouldn't trade them for any other squad in the world." He shook his head with a chuckle. "I won't burden you with platitudes about how you'll come to feel the same. It'll come in time, or it won't. But I promise, Vax, to always treat you fairly, and no differently from any other Warden under my command." The right corner of his mouth quirked upward. "Even if it does turn out you're some sort of favorite of the Raven Queen."

Unbidden, the image of the porcelain mask popped into Vax's mind, and he shuddered. "Let's hope not."

Loral raised an eyebrow. "I've never heard of anything like that deal she cut with you. While I'm hardly an expert..." He shrugged. "Well, we'll see."

Vax half-smiled. "Well, who am I to doubt the word of the Hero of Ferelden?" Loral flinched, and Vax raised an eyebrow. "I'm sorry, should I have not have mentioned that you're the most famous Grey Warden alive today?"

"I hate that title," Loral said. "I didn't end the Fourth Blight for the sake of Ferelden. I did it for the whole world." He glanced at Vax. "I didn't particularly want fame either. Well, I didn't want any of this, really. But it's what I have, and I suppose I wouldn't trade it."

Vax lowered his head. "A few days ago I would've said the same," he murmured. "Turns out I had a price: Vex's life."

Loral responded with a solemn nod. "It's a hard trade. But as we say, in death, sacrifice. Our life to preserve the lives of others. And all Wardens make that trade in the end."

Instead of responding, Vax turned and looked into the fire, Vex and the other Wardens visible out of the corner of his eye. In the crackle of the flames, he thought he heard a soft, distant voice. "Welcome, my champion," it whispered. "We will do great things together, you and I. Embrace your destiny, and your sacrifice, and it is inevitable.

-x-

Morning came, by Sigrun and Oghren's reckoning, and the Grey Wardens went back to where Vox Machina awaited them. It had been a long time since Loral had traveled the Deep Roads with such a large party; he wasn't sure whether to feel safety in their numbers or concern that their noise would attract more darkspawn.

He turned around to check the Wardens following him, and noted that Vax was wearing different armor -- black leathers, trimmed in raven feathers, the crest of a Warden Commander etched in silver on the breast. "Is that the armor?" he asked, nodding in Vax's direction.

Vax glanced at Vex. "_Someone_ convinced me to wear it. I'll try it out, anyway. For now." 

"Good." Loral caught Vex's eye. "Can you lead us back to the thaig where you found it?"

Vex nodded. "It's maybe four hours travel. Follow me." 

She turned, flanked by her brother and her bear, and Loral fell into step behind her, Assan at his heels. It was a strange crew, but perhaps they would do great things together. With renewed evidence the Raven Queen was watching over them, surely they would prevail over this challenge, and any other they might face.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Art For "In Death, Sacrifice"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20383432) by [afteriwake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake)


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